| My son recently asked me the question I have been | | | | balloon. |
| WAITING for one of my children to ask for years. | | | | I'm envisioning at least two extra years of therapy |
| "Mom...how come you get a Mother's Day and we | | | | for my kids due to the "Father's Day Balloon Incident |
| don't get a day?" | | | | of 2009." |
| Haven't you been waiting all of your adult life to | | | | This year, my kids have been planning to write notes |
| answer that question just like your parents did? | | | | to Dad and send them up with the balloons. They |
| "Because every day is Kid's Day." | | | | have been asking me over and over if it's okay. This |
| I never understood that as a child, but now as the | | | | has started to make me nervous that the notes |
| mom of three small children I wish I had a tattoo | | | | might say something like, "Help! This woman doesn't |
| across my forehead that said it. I would be a hit at | | | | know what she's doing and we may be on the verge |
| Chuck E. Cheese. | | | | of juvenile delinquency!" |
| Have you ever noticed how Father's Day tends to | | | | Anyway, I was kind of surprised at the depths of |
| be the day that the dads get to take off and go | | | | my sorrow on my first Mother's Day without him. |
| play golf or something that is decidedly away from | | | | That was when it occurred to me that there was no |
| the rest of the family? And that Mother's Day seems | | | | one here to remember the 200 hours of labor I went |
| to involve a lot of family bonding and yard work? | | | | through to bring three children into the world. That |
| How exactly did that happen? | | | | even though my parents had been around to greet |
| It confirms my belief that these two holidays were | | | | the kids when they finally made their appearance, my |
| invented by a card company to increase sales and | | | | husband was really the only one who was there. He |
| that that card company was run by a man. Probably | | | | may have been slightly hungover for the first one, |
| the brother of the guy who invented pantyhose. | | | | but he was present. And he may have almost missed |
| Otherwise, Father's Day would be in May...just in time | | | | the second one, but he made it. And he was the one |
| for spring clean up. And Mother's Day would be in | | | | who was sitting beside me at church the third time |
| June...the perfect weather for laying by the pool and | | | | around, when my water broke and we decided to go |
| sipping frozen alcoholic beverages. | | | | to brunch before the hospital because we knew we |
| I guess we moms should count ourselves lucky that | | | | wouldn't be fed for awhile. |
| Mother's Day doesn't fall on "National Clean Out Your | | | | It hit me that these memories weren't ours |
| Pantry Day" or something. | | | | anymore...they were mine. That's a big concept to |
| I was strangely oblivious to how hard Mother's Day | | | | swallow. |
| would be the first year my husband was gone. I | | | | I am fortunate that my kids, even though they are |
| knew Father's Day would be hard, but my husband | | | | young, get unreasonably excited about Mother's Day. |
| was never big on spoiling me for Mother's Day. It | | | | They start planning well in advance the things they |
| took him 5 years of very strong hints for him to | | | | are going to do for me. Last year, I figured out that |
| realize...I didn't want to be with any of them on | | | | they were planning on bringing me breakfast in bed |
| Mother's Day. I wanted a break. | | | | and I quickly went out and bought a donut for |
| I know that sounds terrible, but you were thinking it | | | | myself so they could pamper me in the way they |
| too. I just verbalized it. | | | | saw fit. I just had visions of my 4 year old trying to |
| I always knew that Father's Day would be a | | | | navigate the stairs with a full bowl of Cheerios and |
| heart-wrenching day to get through and I've gotten | | | | milk. |
| used to the feeling of dread that hits at the | | | | After three years of widowed Mother's Days, I've |
| beginning of June. I've made all of my kids' teachers | | | | gotten used to being "spoiled" by my kids and not |
| aware of the fact that my husband is no longer with | | | | having the anticipation of a special treat from my |
| us, so all of the Father's Day crafts have the name | | | | significant other. They were rare, but I always lived in |
| "Pop" written on them and are bestowed upon my | | | | hope. Hope of a surprise pedicure appointment. Hope |
| dad when we go over and pay homage. | | | | that he would say, "You deserve a break. Why don't |
| In the last three years, we've gotten into a routine | | | | you go to the movies?" Hope that he would just |
| on Father's Day that includes going up to the | | | | take the kids out of the house and leave me in |
| mountains (where my husband's ashes are buried) | | | | peace for 10 minutes. |
| and releasing balloons. Last year's balloon release hit a | | | | I will say, though, that I kind of miss not having |
| little snag when, as I was putting the three balloons | | | | anyone around to ask, "You didn't get me anything |
| (one for each child) in the back of my minivan, a | | | | for Mother's Day?" |
| huge gust of wind came along and blew one out. This | | | | Wait...now that I think about it...maybe that was his |
| sent me into such a panic that I quickly slammed the | | | | gift. Because there's nothing a mother likes more |
| hatch shut, popping a second one. I managed to | | | | than a good guilt trip. |
| convince my crying children that one balloon was | | | | That sneaky devil. |
| enough and Daddy would know that it was a family | | | | |